Friday, November 11

Short Eyes

To the grey-haired gentleman at the public library Monday: You weren't exactly subtle when that 6 year-old girl walked by you as you pretended to read--I think I heard your neck pop when you crained your head around to keep her in view.

And I know a precocious 12 year old in a Catholic school-girl outfit is the stuff of many a sordid fantasy, but really, sir, putting your sunglasses on so you could oogle her a little less obviously was, well, pretty damn obvious.

I would have said something to you like, "Hey, Short Eyes. You need to be watching yourself," but I didn't want to give you a head's up. Maybe this way, parents will have a fighting chance to keep your sick old self away from their kids.

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