Although I am a first adopter for many things--one of the first in my neighborhood with the internet, a long-standing webpage, I've been reading "Wired" for ages--I, Dear Reader, am getting old. I was talking about the groping charge against Christian Slater at work and the kiddies there were all like, "Who?" which was followed by the sound of this old lady gasping and falling out. Christian Slater, people! Heathers! And don't you dare leave a comment about how you don't know who he is, either.

The kids of today don't know how great they have it. I remember consoling myself in high school when my boyfriend had to be out of town by dreaming of the far future when we would have picture phones. Sure enough, they're here (kinda). We had no computers in my day except for in the computer lab, where there was a green screen, no graphical interface, and all I could do on the damn thing was have it print out (on a dot matrix printer!) my name 150 thousand times.

As for phones, back when I was a young 'un, one did not start a phone conversation by asking "Where are you?" I knew where you were--you were five feet away from your avacado-colored refrigerator. You whippersnappers with your text messaging blow this old lady's mind. I texted a young friend a couple of days ago. "C. . ou. . . .ld. .. . . .yo. . .u. . . giv. . .e. . . . . .me. . .Pa. . u. .. .l'. . .s. . . ph. . .o . . .n . . .e. . .nu. . .mb.. . er. . . .?" Before I could even set the phone down to rest my arthritic fingers from the half hour it took me to type this, the answer came back.

Anyhoo, this is all a set up to introduce the newest member of my family, my Motorola Razr. It's so hip, it doesn't even need all the old-timey vowels! It is sharp, I'm telling you. I got it with you in mind, too. I wanted a phone with a camera so I could add show to my tell on the old Hattie's Blog. Unfortunately, I still have to buy some stuff so I can upload images, and with what the phone set the household buget back, that may be a while.